It’s been a minute but I really feel like I need to just put my thoughts to paper and decompress. The pace at which things have been happening is just insane. We’ve got the house, we’ve made repairs and some paint jobs. We’ve bought and assembled furniture. It’s been absolute mania purchasing things online and at furniture stores and at restaurant supply stores/TJ Maxx even for just this week (granted the last thing is for mostly my own personal projects). It’s so stressful and time consuming and I’m not having fun frankly. It’s this project one day, this major purchase another day, which means lots of driving, lots of money being dealt out, and unscheduled scheduled days which are the absolute worst. I’m running on autopilot and I just need to slow down and not be expected to do this thing or that or buy this or that.
I’m still trying to get my life back on track and all of this is not helping. I just wanna collapse in my bed and not do anything. I’m manifesting for when I can just lie in bed and decide what I wanna do that day and who I wanna be with and just do those things and be with those people. Of course, that day won’t come soon unless I win the lottery or get a sugar daddy. So for now I’m just going to manifest that I will maintain a sort-of steady savings account for the next year, I will commence my next career adventure (and be done with my current job at the library), and perhaps move out in a year or so. Also I hope that my life in general becomes more fun, light and enjoyable. I hope my life doesn’t reach this level of chaos again for a minute, but, if it does, I hope it’s with friends and it’s something I’m absolutely excited for.
Originally written November 30, 2024
